How To End An Argument With A Not-So-Technical Win
Expose your sparring partner's buttocks. This will end any argument abruptly, especially those silly ones where you can sense the tide is beginning to turn against you and you've realized your position is weak.
This gives you the upper hand immediately. Covered butt beats exposed butt. You usually wind up laughing together. Because butts are funny anytime.
In May of 2002 I married into it. My married name can be mispronounced to sound like the word mayonnaise. When he was small, my husband said that other children would make fun of his name; they'd call him, "Eddie Mayonnaise." I never had any cool nicknames like that. It's half mine now.