Old Dog, New Chase
I saw a dog chasing a cat today. I was on my way home from 1 1/2 trips to the store.
Let me explain: I went to the grocery store this evening for the first time in a long while untethered by a toddler. I was drunk with freedom, the freedom one can only know and appreciate when they're not trying to convince the un-convince-able to stay in the buggy while attempting to find 11 specific items on a list among the other 14,352 in the store. I was walking slowly down the aisles, reading the labels and may or may not have lingered longingly in the school supplies. I made my way to the check-out and completed the transaction with zero extra buttons pushed on the debit card payment thingy. I left the store, put all of the groceries in the trunk, returned my cart and got back into the car without trying to convince the un-convince-able that her car seat is a "special chair". Like I said, I was drunk with all of the freedom. I made my way 2/3 of the way home when I realized that I had forgotten a key ingredient in the evening's dish. I had to go back. To the store.
This time, I went in with purpose. Directly to the missed item. Directly to the check-out (carefully avoiding the eyes of the woman that JUST checked me out). Directly back to the car.
With everything necessary from the trip safe in my trunk, I drove home. This is where I saw the dog and the cat. At that moment, watching a dog chase a cat made sense. I've seen the dog around the neighborhood a lot and I've never seen her move this fast. In fact, she's hobbling most of the time. I've always assumed she was ...older. Witnessing those two animals playing out predictable roles gave me a comfort that there may still be predictability. I just may have to look for it. Being a new parent (yes, she's almost TWO and I still consider myself "new") brings unpredictable days, or days full of unpredictable-ness. That makes me tired. I'm tired.
I'm trying to take inspiration from the dog today - the old dog that had the energy when her instinct kicked in. C'mon instinct.
Let me explain: I went to the grocery store this evening for the first time in a long while untethered by a toddler. I was drunk with freedom, the freedom one can only know and appreciate when they're not trying to convince the un-convince-able to stay in the buggy while attempting to find 11 specific items on a list among the other 14,352 in the store. I was walking slowly down the aisles, reading the labels and may or may not have lingered longingly in the school supplies. I made my way to the check-out and completed the transaction with zero extra buttons pushed on the debit card payment thingy. I left the store, put all of the groceries in the trunk, returned my cart and got back into the car without trying to convince the un-convince-able that her car seat is a "special chair". Like I said, I was drunk with all of the freedom. I made my way 2/3 of the way home when I realized that I had forgotten a key ingredient in the evening's dish. I had to go back. To the store.
This time, I went in with purpose. Directly to the missed item. Directly to the check-out (carefully avoiding the eyes of the woman that JUST checked me out). Directly back to the car.
With everything necessary from the trip safe in my trunk, I drove home. This is where I saw the dog and the cat. At that moment, watching a dog chase a cat made sense. I've seen the dog around the neighborhood a lot and I've never seen her move this fast. In fact, she's hobbling most of the time. I've always assumed she was ...older. Witnessing those two animals playing out predictable roles gave me a comfort that there may still be predictability. I just may have to look for it. Being a new parent (yes, she's almost TWO and I still consider myself "new") brings unpredictable days, or days full of unpredictable-ness. That makes me tired. I'm tired.
I'm trying to take inspiration from the dog today - the old dog that had the energy when her instinct kicked in. C'mon instinct.
posted by ktm at 8:39 PM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home