It's Never The Right Thing To Say To A Naked Woman

"You look like a football player."




Even with my clothes on I don't want to hear that sentence, unless it's a comment on the hugeness of the many diamonds I'm wearing or on the speed and grace I have while running. Since I've already got a bit of the "wide shoulder" thing happening with my frame anyway, AND since I've often used the term "football player" to describe myself in jest, you can imagine how much I welcomed this comment. Naked.

Fear not. Eddie came into the bathroom while I was taking a bath and had just splashed water on my made-up face. The mascara was running and THAT is where he got "football player..." From those black thingys they wear under their eyes. It was all laughs after that.

But those 2 seconds before he could explain, I was trying to figure out just how he would fit in the toilet and how much I could get for all his clothes and musical equipment.

If A Group Of Lions Is Called A Pride...

Then what do you call just one lion?

Proud.

While on vacation, we visited the Brownsville Zoo. In almost every city we've lived in or visited, we've been to the zoo. Eddie loves the zoo. Loves it. That is something I find so endearing about him. He's got a genuine, innocent glow when he's watching the animals. I like to see him there and witness the child-like joy.

If he can watch those stinky animals...in the heat... and find a smile, then I know he's going to make an exceptional father.

Pillow Talk

"I went ahead and bought one of those fluorescent lanterns while I was at the store today seeing as how last year, just before the hurricanes, they were all sold out."

"Good call."

"It takes 8-double D batteries."

"What?"

"It takes a lot of batteries, so we should make sure we're stocked up on those too."

"Did you say, 'double-D'?"

"Yes, double-D."

"I don't think they make double-D batteries. It's just D."

"They make AA batteries."

"But that's not how that works."

"I was going according to breast-size. You know they have Es and Fs now too."

"Batteries?"

"No. Breasts."

"When do you think they'll start naming them after planets? Size Jupiter."